keeping up
thoughts from a late bloomer + food review
I feel like I’m in a transitional period in my life where I’ve accomplished a lot of my work goals and I’m wondering what’s next or where I should pivot. I’ve been in this goal-directed mode for so long it’s become automatic.
In an effort to explore more of my interests (outside of working, modeling, watching TikTok, and eating at Erewhon), I’ve been exploring different mediums of art. For example, I’m writing this blog, collaging & scrapbooking, taking outfit pix, watching old movies, etc.
These were all things I enjoyed when I was younger. Before I had my first kiss at 16 (yes I was a late bloomer!) and boys made everything go downhill from there. Or before I started working at Forever 21, my first job. It’s fun to deliberately return to a version of myself that existed before all of that.
On the other hand, my part-time job asked if I want to travel for a big tech client in the month of April. It would be a production-leaning job, and I would potentially be traveling to a lot of different U.S. cities. This would cause me to not take as many modeling jobs, but it’s a good production opportunity. I guess I’m just open to any opportunities at this point to see what comes of it and if I like it.
I will always love modeling and the people it causes me to meet and the fun shoots and outfits I get to wear. How lucky am I to be able to play dress up and dance around for a living! I will always be doing it in some shape or form. Even when I’m 60! Here are some shoots from the past week BTW:
But at the same time, there is something missing in modeling. Models are almost at the bottom of the totem pole to be honest. We are mannequins and don’t really have a say in the creative process. Which I think is something I’ve been hiding behind for so long. Like “Oh if I collaborate with this brand, or this photographer, or this stylist I’ll be cool.” But really I can create things on my own. Maybe it’s laziness? Maybe it’s insecurity? Either way, I want to try to make my own art. Whether that’s through my collage book or simply just styling one of my test shoots myself.
One thing that remains constant, that I never do for an ulterior motive, is trying new restaurants. This past week, I didn’t try a new restaurant, but Sqirl is soft launching their new dinner menu and I went twice in one week. I’ve tried a majority of the menu so here’s my review/rating:
When I went the first time, they were out of chicken liver which is something I really wanted to try. So yesterday after Silver Springs, a cold shower, and a wet-hair-window-down drive to Virgil Village I returned to Sqirl.
In summary, if you go to Sqirl I’d DEFINITELY get the chicken liver, get the fries, and then probably order the steak and chicken for 2 entrees. And end with their molten lava cake :)))
I’ll conclude here with photos of my athleisure outfit I DIYed for Silver Springs: Scout red sweatpants I cut into capris, PINK by VS sports bra from high school (probably pre-first kiss tbh), Prada vintage sneaks from Bearded Beagle, and Chanel sunglasses. I will add that I do not believe in heated workouts, I think it’s a scam. The point of a good workout should be getting a good (natural) sweat and focusing on FORM. Nevertheless, it was a fun experience and something I could do once a quarter.
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MWAH